Why do I love music so much?

This has quite been on my mind recently, so I’m happy to be able to finally put some of this down into words.

Tonight I realized I love reading short stories because of the images they produce.  Kelvin once produced a wonderful image for me through a short story he wrote, and though he says the piece wasn’t good, I say it was great, because in my eyes, I read it to get that sort of an image, and that was the result.

This got me thinking about music, because recently I’ve been getting particuarily… lost in music.  You know, when hours just suddenly pass by because you had a single song on loop.  I’m starting to understand that feeling of being lost.  It’s quite a parallel to the getting lost in a story.  Though it may not be a direct image that the music gives me, in many cases it isn’t, what I get is a wonderful bliss.  A total loss of any sort of a worry or care.  I can be in this state for hours, and it’s wonderful.  Nothing but music filling my head.

I don’t think I realized it at first, but that is what I love most.  That is almost definitely why I love music.  The ability to be so completely surrounded by sound and have it fill me completely.  I’m reminded of this time I was at a dance during waltz lessons.  Everybody else was partnered up, so I sat out, and listened to the music, as I love waltzes.  The Waltz of Flowers started to play.  I might as well have been unconscious, because unless you had punched me, I don’t think I would have noticed you talking to me.  I had my head waving back and forth, my left index finger was conducting, and I was in bliss.  I want to reproduce that, but unfortunately, my compter speakers cannot reproduce that feeling of being surrounded by music I felt there.

So why can music do this?  It’s quite a question.  Why do some pieces totally swallow me while others can’t?  Well, I’m working on this.  I think there’s a few reasons though.  First off, sound is alwys around you.  Whether you notice or not, there are all sorts of sounds around at all times, possibly even music.  Somehow, when I go out of my way to listen, it’s very easy to get sucked in.  I have this thing for “appreciating things you normally ignore,” it’s sort of an odd pleasure of mine.  I think this is part of it.  Sure, you could hear some music in a car that drives by, or you could sit down and just put some Tchaikovsky playing.  Which one is going to swallow me, I wonder.  This is probably the first reason I love music.  It’s just something that… when you notice it, it’s really there.

#2 is subjective, unfortunately, and it’s also one word: Beauty.  I once was listening to Chopin’s Fantasie Impomptu and was asked “Why do you like this piece, all I hear is fast piano.”  Now, I couldn’t give a good response then, because I was freaking speechless.  Because that piece leaves me speechless.  Well, now I’ll simply say “because it’s beautiful.”  And damnit, I’ll even try to explain what makes it beautiful.  It’s almost like trying to climb a slope and constantly sliding down.  The way the piano runs in the main phrase of the piece work remind me of that.  Somebody trying so desperately and failing every single time.  It’s almost pitable, but that’s not the emotion this piece is trying to provoke.  Instead, I’m more left in awe in their sheer desire after so many failures to still get up.  In the middle, there is a slower portion that is nothing but tranquility.  Take this as an insight as to the reason this person is trying so hard.  I don’t know what it is, but his motivation is so solid it can be something this tranquil.  In the final phrase of the piece, it’s quite tragic, I think it represents a total failure, but in the end, there is a glimmer of hope, I think this is sort of a “lesson learned” from the experience or something.  It’s still not a good image to hold onto to justify the beauty of this piece, but I think it begins to get it.

But through the way I can get lost in music and how beautiful music can be, I think I have found why music costs me an hour of sleep regularily.  It’s so much fun ❤

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